WIW Letter

Hey Fam!

I was asked to write a letter for a women's event to encourage an anonymous young woman, sister in Christ. I figured I would post it here, check it out below. 

Dear Sisters in Christ,

There are so many things that I would like to say and express to you in this letter. I have thought long and hard about what I would write and how I would write it. Finally, I decided that I would simply compose a list of the things that I have to remind myself of on a daily basis. Here we go:

1. Your identity and worth is based solely on the fact that you belong to Jesus. It is intrinsic. It does not decrease because of your past, your present, or your future. Your value is sealed by the blood of Jesus. It will not change if your hair is a mess tomorrow or if you get a B on an assignment.

2. Pain, hurt,and heartbreak are real and they cut deep. Grace, love,and forgiveness are real too and 1000x greater. 

3. The enemy and even our feelings lie to us. Nothing can combat the lies, like the truth of God's word.

4. Darkness only breeds more darkness. Everything we hide will eventually come to the light, eat us up on the inside, or both. 

5. Church hurt is REAL, but it does not give us an excuse to avoid fellowship with other believers. Your brothers and sisters who inflicted pain upon you need grace, just like you.

6. Community is essential. In fact, it's what God has called us to. There are brothers and sisters in the faith who are willing to grow with you, seeking community in a local church body is essential. 

7. God's plans are better than ours, even when it seems like they are not, even when we have no idea where we are headed. 

8. You were created by a God of love to love and be loved. Love is an action word, just do it. 

9. There is nothing you could do that could make God's love for you lessen OR increase.

10.God's grace is sufficient. God's grace is sufficient. God's grace is sufficient. 

I pray that you would remember these things when the going gets tough and the lies of the enemy get loud. 

With Love,

Brittany T. Paschall 

Unmasked

     I'm not much of a fan of New Year's Resolutions. However, I do think that the New Year is an excellent chance to make a conscious choice to change or improve our lives. Next week I will embark on my own journey of valuing myself and others outside of materialistic things. On Janauary 1, 2014 I will commit myself to not buying clothes for an entire year. I am committing myself to learning to see beyond materialistic things. I am committing myself to love and be loved for who I am and for who others are, nothing more, nothing less.

     This journey will not be easy, especially for me. Hopefully, it will help me learn to truly value myself and others as image bearers of the Most High. Hopefully, it will lead me closer and closer to God's heart. Material things are easy cover ups, just like make up or food,etc. It's time for us to live unmasked lives, so that people can see God's redemptive power in every single aspect of our lives. My journey is bound to be challenging and might even reveal brokeneddnes within my own heart and life that is often ignored. Still, no matter where this road takes me, I am confident that He is with me every step of the way. 

     As I embark on this journey, I would love it if you all would pray for me. Some of my friends have also decided to give one thing up in an effort of support, please pray for them as well. I plan to keep a journal daily and compile them into a weekly blog(posted here). I also plan on creating a Twitter and Instagram, especially for my journey.Let's be unmasked in 2014!

God bless,

Brittany 

I am here. I am with and for you.

Today marks World Suicide Prevention day and I am one of many who will dedicate their blog to the topic. I  am so grateful that this day and week exists to bring awareness to issues regarding depression, suicide, and mental health. It begins here, but it cannot stop here.

Three years ago, I lost a cousin to suicide. So, I know first hand what it looks like when people blame other people or the person for the acts of the enemy. Remember, that the battle is not against flesh and blood, it's just not. 

It's time for us to stop trying to find someone or something to blame. Depression, suicide, and mental health are no one person's fault, but rather the result of the enemy's strongholds in our lives as human beings. It's time that we be present for and with people. It's time that we stop trying to fix people like home improvement projects because honestly we are just as broken.

The friends that I hold closest to my heart are always with and for me, they are always there in word, deed, action, truth, and love. No, they don't always know what to say in the fire, but neither do I. I do know the power of just being there though. I have learned how to just sit with people in the midst of the pain and confusion. Sometimes it's easy to get busy and forget to dig deep in our relationships, to go below the surface. I'm convinced that slowing down to know what's really going on with people around us is always worth it. 

Maybe you have struggled with depression or suicide, maybe it hits really close to home with you. Maybe it's not your struggle at all. Regardless, please know that your presence in this world is unlike any other, you are loved, and no one can bring what you bring to the table, no one. Hope and help are REAL. You cannot be replaced.

I am not saying this to sound religious or like a motivational speaker and I am sure you have read or heard this one-thousand or more times.  I am only speaking the truth because I am with and for you in this walk towards the light. I am with and for you. Most importantly, we can find rest in the fact that Jesus is always with and for us. He is, I promise you because He promised us. 

Today, I challenge you to be with and for someone who needs you. I also challenge you to let someone be that for you if you need them to. I personally have some friendships that have grown distant over these past few weeks because of school and the happenings of life. So, I'm going to start trying to repair them by asking what my friends need and by making sure they know that I am with and for them. It's so important that we have each other and today, World Suicide Prevention Day is just a reminder and manifestation of that.

****Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.” (Hebrews 13:5 NLT)

Get Help Here: http://twloha.com/ ***

Peace and Love,

Brittany

Combat Zone

Hey fam!

 The truth is that all of us are fighting our own war. We all have lost some battles, we all have had some victories. All of us have different combat zones. All of us have battle scars. Some of us are wounded. 

 A scar is a wound that has been healed. It's still there, but it's not bleeding or as painful to touch. On the other hand, a wound is open, risking the chance of bleeding and even infection.  

 

 Think about what happens when we see someone skin their knee or get a bad cut. Usually, we would run over in an effort to help and comfort. The problem is that most of our scars and wounds are internal. 99% of the time we cannot see abuse, addiction, depression, loneliness, etc. by looking at someone.

 Still, there is no excuse for us not to provide First Aid,  to be the hands and feet of Jesus. The process looks different for each of us. For me, it starts with seeing people as wounded and with scars, just like me. It's realizing that what hurts me might not hurt them, but that we all know hurt in some form. It's allowing God to show me the people He would have walk with me. It's being willing to let these people help bandage my wounds.

 It's time for us to bandage each others wounds instead of turning away or leaving one another bleeding. It's time that we learn to pray for each other, really pray for each other. It's time that we dig deeper in our relationships and friendships. We have to love past the scars and the wounds. After all, who are we to give up on someone?

Ultimately, Jesus does the healing. We are just the nurses(medics) who have the privilege of working for the doctor who has never lost a patient. 

Peace & Love,

Brittany 

911: Broken Friendships and Relationships

Hey fam!

It's been a minute since I posted and I pray that post finds you doing well. Recently, I have been dealing with the shattered pieces of broken relationships and friendships. Some because of transition, some because of lack of communication, some because of grudges. However, I have concluded that God is not pleased with broken relationships, regardless of the reason. 

Yes, there are times where it is best for both parties to go their separate ways and not look back. These times a rare, very rare. In fact, this is the worst case scenario for any of our relationships and friendships.

At the end of the day, our broken relationships and friendships are not a communication issue, a result of transition, or anything else. Broken relationships and friendships are a direct result of a lack of intimacy with Christ. Now, I am not suggesting that you don't pray enough or read your Bible enough. I am suggesting that friendships and relationships are one of the hardest areas to completely surrender to Christ.

Over the past few days and weeks, I let pain blind me. I let it drive me into saying harsh words to dear friends. I let it convince me that all of the brokenness within relationships is just a part of life.

Still, there is grace even in this. There is grace for the harsh parting words of a broken friendship. There is grace for the tear-stained eyes of heartbreak. There is grace for you and the family member that you have not spoken to in months or years. There is grace even in this, even in this.

Grace is my friend Jesus. My friend who met me in the midst of the hurt and harsh words. My friend who reminded me that sometimes my expectations are too high because no one can love me like He can. The same friend that held my hand though the tears and doubt. Yet, loved me enough  to not let me linger or settle for the brokenness in my relationships or friendships. The friend who offered to go with me on this journey of restoration and healing. 

I am so very thankful for my friend. He is walking with me as I sort through multiple friendships and relationships. I must admit it would be much easier to leave things broken, to run, duck, and hide. It is so much more rewarding to get your friends and family members back, to have a long hug after months, to let Jesus show you how to be a friend because He is the friend. He is our friend. 

Peace & Love,

Brittany 

Healing Starts Small: Confessions of a Small Group Leader: Part II

Hey fam!

It's a Thursday afternoon and I am at home, staring out of my bedroom window.Honestly, it has been quite some time since I have had the opportunity just to gaze upon our Lord's creation, to find joy in even the smallest of moments even the sad, rare moments. Just earlier today I attended a funeral and now just looking at the sunshine from my bedroom window, I know she is at rest and that God will heal her family and loved ones just as He always does and it might start as small as this sunshine. I know you are thinking, "What does this have to do with small group life?" And honestly I would have wondered the same thing a few weeks ago. I went into my group thinking that if any type of growth or healing took place, it would be drastic, large-scale, and nothing short of a miracle. I was wrong.

Sometimes I think it's convenient for us to mold God's words and promises according to our views of things, which is not always eternal. It's no surprise that enemy tends to take this advantage of this situation. So, when my group members weren't all racing to teach, lead, write their own studies,etc.; I took it as The Lord not keeping His promises of drawing near to His people when we seek Him and of providing us with wisdom.When we would end our studies and my group members weren't confessing that they had come out of some type of an addiction or stopped committing   some "major" sin, or released a major resentment,etc.; I took it as God not keeping His promise of healing. It didn't take me long to realize that I was ALL wrong because all of the promises of God are a yes in Christ Jesus (see 2 Corinthians 1:20). The thing is this: God keeps His promises and fulfills them according to His plan and purpose, not mine, not yours, but His. 

The case was no different within my group and when I look closely over the course of the group, God has been healing and working since the second we got started. My friends will tell you I'm a list maker and I decided to make one of the ways God is at work in the group.It's one of those things I keep for the days when the enemy tries to get all in my heart and head. Here are just a few things on the list(names have been changed):

1. We are still together!

-It's only been about four months, but the enemy has tried to put an end to us in so many ways.

2. God is teaching us to trust His plans above ours.

-Everything doesn't go our way, our events get moved and canceled, people don't show, etc. AND God continues to do something in the midst of the mess.

3. God is healing Nathan's heart of running from community because of who He is.

-He is learning slowly, but surely that He can find community with the people of God.

4. God is is healing Kimberly's heart of not wanting to even be around other Christians at all.

-It is taking time, but God is softening her heart day by day.

5. God is healing Michelle's heart of trying so hard to be the perfect Christian and of feeling intimidated by other Christians who seem to "have it together".

- She is learning that God's love for her is truly unconditional and that all she has to do is continue to seek Him, even when she messes up, that she has such a powerful testimony and is so capable at being who God has called her to be.

6. God is teaching Cameron that He cannot escape the love of Christ and that God never leaves Him.

7. God is healing John's heart of being 100% self-reliant and "perfect".

-He is learning that it is alright to open up and that God will still love Him just the same if He struggles, that God can and will use Him in spite of.

8. God is healing my heart of needing so much control.

- I'm learning that God's plan never fails and that I can rest in it. 

9. God is teaching us that love is so powerful.

- It is His love and our love for each other that keeps us together through thick, thin, and real thin.

10. God is teaching us that we were never created to do life alone and that community isn't easy, but worth it.

- This has been a hard pill to swallow, but as I texted the group a few nights ago: "We need each other and that's that."

The things above only provide a glimpse of what God can do with just a small group of people after His heart. Notice, I used the present tense because I refuse to believe He's finished with us. Tonight, especially after the day I have had, I will go into Bible Study with the group remembering that healing starts as small as sunshine coming through a bedroom window.

P.S- I'll be back with more Confessions of a Small Group Leader soon.

Peace & Love,

Brittany 

Confessions of a Small Group Leader: Part 1

Hey fam!

 It has been awhile since I posted. Today and over the next few blogs I would like to discuss small group life. About five months ago,The Lord led me to start a small group with a few of my friends/young people(especially athletes) in my city. It has been such a journey from then to now. There have been tons of laughs and even some tears, but it has been worth it. Here are some of my confessions of a small group leader:

1. I think in the back of my mind somewhere I had the idea that covenants,creeds, and icebreakers would magically create community within my group. I mean why wouldn't they? All of the books and trainings encourage these things and they are indeed essential. However,they do NOT breed community. Experience breeds community, the love of Christ breeds community, walking with people through the hell and pain that life sometimes throws at us breeds community,time breeds community.

2. I thought that structure was everything, it's not. In fact, it will drive group members crazy and even though it is hard for me to back off of having things exactly like this or that, I would much rather have less structure and a whole lot of Christ and His work within the group.

3.Anytime you have a group of people together there will be conflict, issues with making group meetings,etc. I believed that I was doing something wrong when people started to miss meetings, come late,etc.  Looking back over things I realize that it wasn't my fault, things just happen that are outside of my control. It is my responsibility to seek God's heart as a leader and to give my best effort. The rest is in His hands, not mine.

 

4. I thought I had to be in "leader mode" in order to be taken seriously. I was caught up in all of the things I had read and heard about leading a group. For example, "Selective Sharing", which is the idea that you share selectively in order not to promote a sin or struggle. I am not bashing the concept, only suggesting that in my case it lead to me not sharing at all or feeling guilty when I did share, ask for prayer,etc. I realize now that just because I am the leader doesn't make me need Jesus or the community  of my group any less. I think it makes me need him more. Furthermore, how can I expect my group members to practice things like transparency, authenticity, etc. if I don't do this myself.

5. I think the first time I heard of Ephesians 6 was in Pre-K. We made armor of God suits and such in VBS. Over a decade later, I went into leading the group seeing the battle as one against people(flesh and blood). Praise God that He changes hearts! The group is living proof that the battle is truly against the powers of the darkness and not flesh and blood. Let's just say we have had quite our share of the enemy trying to infiltrate our group.

I am going to leave my confessions here for today.My small group has a long way to go and so do I as a leader. Thankfully, we serve a God who is both faithful and full of grace.

Peace & Love,

Brittany